Friday, February 20, 2009

IF I were an Islamic Fundamentalist Extremist

IF I were an Islamic Fundamentalist Extremist

By Mit Etagniw

Some of the public debate on the treatment of “Islamofacists” by our own “Christofacists” centers on the issue of fundamentalism relating to the separation of church and state. Recently there have been social trends that have blurred the fine line that kept the two separate and complementary. The issues of morality, values, where they come from and what should they be, have been co-opted by the fundamentalist religious right flexing their political muscle. The debates over terrorism, civil liberties, homosexuality, abortion, the death penalty, science and religion, have become increasingly belligerent by the “Christofacists” who’s ultimatum of, “You are either with us or against us!” is a cognitive distortion of reality. “All or nothing” thinking is typical to fundamentalism where issues are a simplistic, right or wrong, black or white, good or bad, in or out, faithful or infidel, etcetera. Thus, the people in between the warring factions lose their humanness in the broad brush of fundamentalist certainty and become just “collateral damage” of the pogrom, crusade, or jihad.

As one who is in the middle and values moderation, I suggest that the extremists take their battles outside and leave the rest of us alone. Therefore, I “Swiftly submit this modest proposal For Preventing the Moderate People of the World from Being a “Collateral Damage” Burden to Their Parents or Country, thus Making Them to Continue to be Productive and Beneficial to Humankind.

IF I were an Islamic fundamentalist extremist, I wouldn’t waste my time on the generally moderate American public. They are much like the generally moderate Islamic public. I would strike the root of the real enemy of Islamic fundamentalist extremism, the Jewish fundamentalist extremists a.k.a. the Zionists. However, I wouldn’t go after them directly. I would use a tactic that Sun Tzu taught of going after their supply lines. Christian fundamentalist extremists are one of the major supply lines. They are the main philosophical, religious and financial support for the Zionists. It is Christian fundamentalist extremist theology that teaches that the “Jews” are the chosen people of God and therefore, according to their leaders, should be “blessed” (helped, encouraged, financed) so that God will bless the Christian fundamentalist extremists. I wouldn’t waste my time, Dinars and Rials on the planes, trains and automobiles of the ignorant infidels. After all, this is a war for the control of the world’s resources (people, oil, gas, minerals, livestock, crops, virgins etc.) by competing fundamentalist extremists.

It is well known that the aspiring emperor of the New American Century has a large base of support from Protestant Christian fundamentalist extremists who in practice are Zionists. Although many of them claim to be “Bible” believing Christians, most of them haven’t a clue about their own religion and misinterpret their own “Bible”. For example, if you were to ask them if they thought that Abraham was a Jew they would reply “yes”. Ignorant of course of the Biblical “history” that “Jews” are named after Abraham’s great grandson Judah, whose descendants survived conquerings and deportations. Biblically, Abraham was a Chaldean descendant of Eber from whom the Hebrews are named. Furthermore, today a majority of “Jews” are not the genetic descendants of Judah but a genetic blend of peoples from Asia Minor and Europe whose ancestors converted to a variation of Pharisaic Judaism in the 7th century.

But, not to worry because that is all “Old Testament Law" stuff and doesn’t matter anymore because it has been done away with. They claim to be “New Testament” people except for the “10 Commandments”, and they mean the Protestant Christian fundamentalist extremist ten that are different from the Jewish and Roman Catholic versions. However, they retained the “Catholic” Sabbath day change to from Saturday to Sunday by the Council of Laodicea (A.D. 364). They follow the teachings of Paul, rather than the teachings of Jesus. Remember, “love your enemy”, “turn the other cheek” and “walk the extra mile?” Replaced by the new crusade of stamping out Islamic fundamentalist extremists by attacking moderate Islamics. They misapply James 1:27 from “visiting” distressed widows and orphans to visiting distress upon widows and orphans who are now acceptable collateral damage. WWJD now means “Who Would Jesus Distress?”

Of course Christian fundamentalist extremist “theological” disagreements have been going on since Saul of Tarsus (a legalistic Jewish zealot) got knocked off his horse hit his head, had a vision, went blind, became Christian, got back some sight, disappeared, had another vision, reappeared, changed his name to Paul, became a missionary, started arguing with Peter, James, Mark, Barnabas, got arrested for mouthing off, sent off to Rome and then wrote a bunch of letters that changed the Gospel to the Gospaul before he was executed. In fact these Christian fundamentalist extremists are just following the pattern of hypocrisy and bloodletting that has dogged western civilization since Constantine declared Christianity the new religion of the Roman Empire around 325 A.D., replacing and appropriating much of the sacraments and ritual of Mithraism. “By this sign you will be victor!” “Convert or die!” Of course it didn’t stop with the unconverted. “You must confess to believe as we do or die!” That was what many a divergent minority such as the variant catholic and protestant groups heard from those Christian fundamentalist extremists of their time. Sometimes the conflicts lasted years and transported across generations. Much like the Jihads of the Islamic sects against each other and variations of Islam that continue today.

I mean, really! Think about it! These fundamentalist extremist expressions are bloodthirsty perversions of actually moderate religious beliefs that have given succor and hope to millions. But what do you expect since the belief system that they sprang from is rooted in the postponed ritual human sacrifice for that of an animal? Remember Genesis 3:21 where God in the Garden of Eden covering the “sin” of Adam and Eve with animal skins? Also, Genesis 4:3-4, God didn’t like Cain’s sacrificial hot salad appetizer, He only wanted Abel’s barbecue lamb sacrifice main course. Furthermore, let us not forget the main event here that spawned these three religions, specifically the aborted sacrifice of Abraham’s offspring Isaac or Ishmael depending on who is telling the story, for that of a ram caught in a thicket.

Even in the moderate form the religious role-play reflects some variation of ritual human sacrifice and cannibalism. From the Passover lamb slaughtered and eaten, whose blood is used to mark the door posts so the Angel of Death would pass-over to kill the first born males in Egypt, to the red fez representing the spilled blood of Christians worn as a trophy with the scimitar for convert or die to the sign of the cross, an instrument of torture and death, and the “mystery” of drinking blood wine and eating wafers that turn into the god/human flesh of the new Passover Lamb.

These Christian fundamentalist extremists are just like the Islamic fundamentalist extremists who are just like the Jewish fundamentalist extremists. They want to control what a person does. They don’t really care about how much of an invasive socialist collectivist society that they live in as long as they can control a person’s mate(s), children, property, travel, food, sexuality, pain alleviation, personal reading and art appreciation. It is a battle for the control of the human race. It is the fundamentalist extremists that are in competition with each other. Therefore, IF I were an Islamic fundamentalist extremist I would go after the Christian fundamentalist extremists and their followers.

Furthermore, IF I were an Islamic fundamentalist extremist who didn’t want more collateral damage to continue to play into the ongoing hitting-back for hitting-back for hitting-back mentality as described in Harold Thomas’ The Myth of the Innocent Civilian, the thing to do, would be to bring down their Christian fundamentalist extremist clubhouses during off hours kind of ala Fight Club.

Possibly just a threat of this would be enough to raise the expense of added security that would reroute funding away from the Zionists. Instead of angering the moderate Americans, it might well bring them some relief from the pejoratives of the pulpit parrots proclaiming their pugnacious polemics. The Christian fundamentalist extremists may back off for half a century or more. Or, maybe they will re-evaluate their relationship to the Zionist cause since it is costing them more than just the hushed up U.S.S. Liberty debacle and the ongoing Israeli secret stealing, espionage.

Better yet, they may begin to treat their churches the same way as they treat their other public gatherings. They already have moved to limit sermon content. They may further limit their freedoms to protect their freedoms with metal detectors, ID checks, body pat downs and bag searches. Also, they may require a background check and issue permits before participants can practice their pantomimes of ritual human sacrifice and cannibalism. After all, there are government controlled liquids (alcohol), food (crackers and wafers) and flammables (are those robes & vestments fire retardant?) that are being used with children involved! Furthermore, someone could poison the wine, hide explosives in candles and mix Anthrax in the incense censor!!

The American general public is moderate and will not participate in the perpetuation of Christian fundamentalist extremism if it is too costly, and thus the Zionist fundamentalist extremism would lose out as well. Furthermore, it could encourage the migration of Christian fundamentalist extremists to more moderate denominations or to the increasingly impoverished sects of the Rapture cults where they can turn inward while waiting for Jesus to come back. Then the Islamic fundamentalist extremists could win by default because of attrition. That’s what I would do IF I were an Islamic fundamentalist extremist.

Fortunately for the Christian fundamentalist extremists, Islamic fundamentalist extremists are not that bright and will continue to follow the promptings of their NeoCon CIA handlers and keep enraging the general public to continue to support the Project for a New American Century and the growing fascist police state, instead of getting the manipulators who are behind it all.

Dirka-dirka, Mohammed jihad, dirka-dirka! Qaplah!

Per the Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act section 216, the proceeding article is for entertainment purposes only and does not reflect the views of any ISP, or anyone reading it, or posting it especially the author who is a loyal citizen of Greater America brought to us by Our Leader’s new Pax Americana! Hail Bushtler! the Obamanator!



Mit Etagniw was raised in a Christian fundamentalist Pentecostal home. He attended Bible College and subsequently went into the “ministry.” He became a Christian fundamentalist extremist. While on his high horse he was blinded by the light of reason, fell off his horse and has been better ever since. He considers himself to be a Deistic Gnostic agnostic, (he chooses to believe that there is a higher consciousness, however, he knows that he doesn't know.) Also, he is a community rights activist, and tending to be an anarchical capitalist libertarian voluntaryist. He writes occasionally for his blog, Freedom Shenanigans & High Jinks and teaches a Sons of Liberty Seminar - Monkey Wrenching for Activist Burnouts. His current themes are, Embrace Your Inner Outlaw, Carpe Libertas, and Nemo Me Impune Lacessit!. Email: mitetagniw@gmail.com.

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